Do you feel like you’re “sleep-walking” through life? Do you wish you had more freedom? Do you wish you had more adventure? Do you wish you had more time? Do you wish you had more love? Do you dread Monday mornings?
Set goals and write them down. Set goals by month, year, 5 year, and 10 year periods. Know what you want to achieve for each stretch of your life, and make sure to look back and see if you actually made the progress you wanted. This list will constantly evolve and you won’t reach every one of your goals, but writing your goals down will make it more likely that you will achieve them.
1. Don’t live for others. Don’t choose your path in life based on the expectations set on you by others, whether its your parents, friends, or society in general.
2. Live for others. Don’t let others choose your path for you, but don’t choose a path that will hurt those around you. Its easy to get caught up in your own life, but if you don’t take care of those you love, what is it all for in the end?
3. Maintain an internal locus of control. There are 2 kinds of people, those who focus on what they can control, and those that focus on what they can’t. Don’t blame others for your own failure – there’s always someone out there who was dealt a worst hand that made more of it than you did.
4. Don’t complain. If you’re not happy with something in your life, you can complain about it, or you can actively work to change it. Which one will you choose?
5. Don’t be jealous. Not because its morally wrong, but because jealousy is a destructive emotion. Its also a symptom that you’re not living your life to the fullest – people who are fulfilled can celebrate other people’s success. People who aren’t fulfilled fill up their emotional void through negative emotions.
6. Don’t be a crab in the bucket. You’ve heard the expression “crabs in the bucket” – its the tendency crabs have for pulling other crabs back down, right when they’re about to climb out. When you break from the norm, you’ll get pushback from your loved ones. Its not jealousy – they genuinely care for us. But people living the life society tells them to live get scared when they see others going for it. Even if they do it subconsciously, and even if it’s out of genuine concern – its still harmful. It creates a culture of conformity, mediocrity, and quiet desperation. Don’t be a crab in the bucket.
7. It’s OK to fail. The only way to avoid failure is to not try anything. Don’t be afraid to fail…that’s how you succeed. Besides, it’s only really a failure if you stop trying.
8. Overcome fear of failure by visualizing the worst case scenario. A great way to overcome fear of failure is to confront your worst possible nightmare. If you try it and fail, what is the worst thing that will happen? Write it down, then write down what it would take to get back to where you are now. 99.9% of the time, you’ll find that the worst case scenario isn’t nearly as scary as you thought it would be and the only thing holding you back is your own mindset. The .1% of the time where failure will push you past a point of no return (so basically, death or life altering physical harm) – those are you may want to reconsider.
9. Don’t gossip. Sure it might make you feel better about yourself, for the moment. But it can have negative ramifications, both internally and externally.
10. Ignore the things you can’t (or won’t) change. Ever notice how insanely emotional youtube comments are? People cling to their opinions like they’re a lifeline. Yet these are almost always opinions about things that have absolutely no effect on their daily lives. Yes, there are shitty things going on in the world. Unless you’re planning to do something about it, ignore it and focus on the things in your life that you can change.
11. Change things. You can make a difference – once you stop dismissing yourself. Approach challenges with the mindset of “how am I going to accomplish this?” instead of “what can I possibly do?”. But if you’re not actually going to work to to change something, then see the point above. Time to put up or shut up.
12. Take care of your body. Eat healthy when you can, get a good night’s sleep, and exercise. Your only connection with this world is through this fleshy meat vehicle we call our bodies. Take good care of it.
13. Take care of your mind. Stop feeding it a constant stream of junk. A little downtime is alright, but don’t dedicate every free hour you have to watching realty TV, watching gossip blogs, checking sports scores, and doing other stuff that requires little mental energy. Even the news can rot your brain with its constant barrage of negativity and biased sensationalism.
14. Plan for the future, but live in the present. A 25 year mortgage, retirement with full pension at 65, working hard for the bonus and putting off the big vacation until next year – while planning for the future is important, don’t sacrifice all of the present. Find a way to enjoy life as you work towards bigger and better things.
15. Live consciously. We all get into ruts and routines we use to get through the day, but we only have a limited number of days on this earth. Don’t put life on auto-pilot – live consciously. Always ask yourself – why am I doing this? If you wake up too many mornings in a row without a good answer, then its time to make a change.
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